When A Friendship Ends
Friendships are integral to human life. Friendships are important because they provide a special kind of emotional intimacy that can be challenging to establish with family members. Good friends make us feel safe, witnessed, heard, and appreciated for being who we are. A long-time friend understands us so well they can predict our thoughts, feelings, and reactions when facing crisis, often before we do. They know what we need in times of distress and patiently support and encourage us with their presence. They respond when we are suffering; determining quickly whether to share words of comfort, or become a silent, caring witness. And, a trusted friend doesn’t hesitate pointing out the truth when we can’t see it.
Human Experiences
Friendships are living, breathing, functional human experiences that, like everything else in nature, needs to be tended and nurtured. Not all friendships end, but we learn some of our greatest life-lessons when one does. Every friend is different, unique, special. Every friendship has its own characteristic, timeline, and purpose.
Lessons Gained
When a friendship dissolves, we don't always know how to respond or what to do. We need to mourn the loss and become more introspective when the friendship is not repairable. We need to ask ourselves: What does this mean? How can I honor and accept its demise when I do not want it to end? What did the friendship provide? How did it made me feel? Where did I grow as a result of it? As dreadful as the loss of a friendship is, it’s vital to our emotional health to embrace the truth that endings happen for a reason, and by not trusting that reason, we prolong our suffering. While grieving the loss, it’s good to remind ourselves that when one friendship ends another has the space to enter; one that will show and teach us another kind of relationship education.
“By honoring the gifts that the passing friendship provided, and allowing it to end with insight, compassion, and gratitude the pain of that loss becomes softer and great deal more bearable. ”